HOW TO GET YOUR EX BACK with the L-O-V-E Method.  This approach increases your ability to receive and give love by increasing your self esteem.  Good self esteem increases self care with better boundaries and greater self dignity.

You cannot love another until you learn how to love yourself.  The end of this article has some channeling on how to receive love with self love first.

I’ve been working with a client who lost her boyfriend after four years of a rocky relationship.   Finally after he kept making it very difficult for her to feel secure with him, she decided to not return his phone calls.

Within four week of her silence, he found a new girlfriend.  She was devastated.

To make matters worse he kept trying to contact her, which meant he still felt connected to her.

She was unable to do anything.  Eating, sleeping, even working was difficult for her, because she really thought she loved this man and could not live without him.

Did you hear what I just wrote?  She thought she could not live without him.

The first step to get your ex back is to create a YOU so relevant, so fulfilled that the love in your life is a compliment to you, not your purpose for being.

There are many systems out there which appear to be manipulative, but the essence of what they teach is to love yourself first.  They tell you want to do so those who do not know how to love themselves, can act as if they do.

Perhaps this begins the process of self love.  I will leave that to you to decide.

Instead of my client taking time to clear her head, she ran after her ex boyfriend, while he was with this new girlfriend.  She was desperate and allowed her to be seen as this by her ex boyfriend and his new girlfriend.

After a few years of back and forth on this, yes, this went on for years, my client heard from her ex boyfriend.  He said he was leaving his girlfriend.

She eagerly welcomed him back into her life only to see him pull away once again!

Here is a plan for what to do if you lose yourself in a relationship, thinking it is about losing your ex boyfriend or girlfriend and want them back.

The steps spell the word LOVE.

Step 1.  The “L” in LOVE stands for Let Go.

Let go of trying to get back your ex. For 21 days minimum do not contact them.  Yes!  You heard right.  Instead of trying to get them back.  Get yourself back.  More on that in Step 2.

This will give yourself and your ex a chance to heal, gain perspective and emotional detachment, integral to creating improved communication in the future.

Step 2.  The “O” in the word LOVE stands for Open to YOU!  Love yourself.  Do what you love.  There is a popular catchy idea going around lately to marry yourself first.

Well this is a version of this.  Create exciting new conditions in your life in the areas of health, wealth and wisdom.

Some ideas include, get regular massage, take up a new sport.  Get an image or beauty makeover.  Lose some weight.  Get into shape.  Go on a trip.

Seek nurturing with a counselor.  Improve your self esteem by accomplishing something new.

A cute story.  My client around this time accidentally went to a male strip review for a girl friend’s bachelorette party.  To her surprise this healed her relationship to her sexuality.

It shifted her from feeling someone else (her ex boyfriend) had to turn her on, to knowing she could be turned on in another context.  This was a turning point for her in releasing dependence on her ex boyfriend to feel loved.

She began to get herself back!

Step 3.  The “V” in the word LOVE stands for Verbalize Agreement.  After you have had at least 21 days to start creating an exciting focus on yourself, it is time to communicate with your ex.

Open this process with psychic telepathic messages.  This would be an excellent way to get him or her “primed” for contact.

The basic message I would send them is, “Hello.”  This will allow they to perhaps start thinking they’d like to hear from you, especially since you have created some distance between the two of you.

More on how to do Telepathy HERE.

You might find your ex will text you.  If they do you have an extremely valuable piece of information.  This means you and he are still connected emotionally.  Receiving telepathic messages when sent can indicate this.

If they do not text you of their own accord, you can still text them with a simple, sweet, short message such as “just want to know if you are ok.  I am doing great and enjoying the time on my own.”

You are essentially stating you are doing well without them, you think the breakup a good idea and opens the doors of communication to occur should your ex be interested in doing so.

Wait a day or two and say something great that you are doing.  If your ex wants more information suggest this could be done in person.  Then you are ready for face to face contact.

Remember to look and feel your best when doing this and be in a healed emotional state, not nervous, wanting or longing for them or their approval.  If you are not yet healed, then you should wait to do this until you are healed.

Healed means you are in love with yourself.  You are complete.  There is something extremely compelling and attracting about being complete.  It is the essence of charisma.

Remember always to own yourself.  This will allow discovery of you.  This creates desire.

When you own yourself, when you are complete, you will not be in a reveal all about me mode of existence.  You will be in a I am me and you are you mode of existence.

Being whole is key to a healthy relationship.   It creates excitement, discovery and newness in a relationship.  It communicates you are fulfilled and not focused on them for your happiness.

This healthy self esteem can rebuild a relationship if that is what you and your ex decide to do after your meeting again.  Your relationship could have ended because you acted like your happiness depended on how they treated you.

In fact the essence of dysfunctional relationships is seeking happiness from another.  When you become the source of your own happiness, your relationships, all of them, improve.

When you really, genuinely become the “source” of your happiness everything falls into place.

Say little.  Be friendly.  Set up a meeting.  Suggest a coffee date or a walk in the park, something on neutral ground and impersonal.

Step 4.  The “E” of the word LOVE stands for Engage in contact.

First Meeting.  Have your friendly, impersonal meeting.  Again keep it short,  reiterating how clear you head is now that you are broken up, how much you are doing.

Don’t explain everything about how you feel, what you are doing, etc.  Plan to spend a limited amount of time with them, creating an appointment for somewhere you have to go or something you have to do.

Do not tell them exactly what that appointment is for.

Second Meeting.  Then the next date could be a group event like a street fair, something impersonal.  Follow the lead from the first meeting.  Keep conversation friendly, happy and alluring, but never needy.

Third Meeting.  This could now be a date in a more intimate setting perhaps dinner for two in a private setting.

During this time leave the space for your ex to ask you out again or ask you to be his or hers again.

DO NOT ASK THEM!

If you are not asked to go out with them again, relax.  Just keep doing the above steps making your life great, casually keeping in touch with them, and seeing them in person.  If after a long time this has not resulted in a reunion, do not despair.

This approach can work most of the time if your ex still wants you and you him, however, if you ex has moved on emotionally, it is for the best for you to do so as well.

When you really LOVE yourself you do not run after another who does not or cannot love you.

This leads me to the next point.  If you had a breakup maybe it was for a great reason and you don’t want them back.

I have alluded to some reasons for a breakup above.  However, the subject of being whole before being in a relationship could fill a book.

CHANNELING on HOW TO ACHIEVE LOVE

Dear Spirit Guides if one is in a unloving relationship or situation how does one turn this around to receive love?  How does one get back their ex or at least get back their dignity, peace of mind and self esteem so they can achieve love? 

Love is an interesting subject for those on earth.

Remember we already told you that love is not something to get or have.  You are already love in the absolute sense.

If there were no creator you would not be love of course, however, there is a creation process or method which does require love for it to occur.

When the All creates the specific from itself it creates you from and using LOVE.

Love is what you are made of.

Those on earth come to this place to experience a feeling of not having love so you can recreate it on your own.

There are many methods to recreate the feeling of love.

They all start with the first step.  This step is to know you are LOVE right now.

When you understand your magnificence you will not buy into another person’s illusion that there is no love and you do not have love now.

You will claim you are wonderful, great, magnificent and you will act accordingly.

Love is the center of all good things.  Love is the magic of life.  Without LOVE there is no purpose to being, no reason for living.  Thus many are obsessed with Love.

The way to avoid obsession is to increase your own self esteem with self care, self love and self aggrandizement.  Then when another comes to you and behaves in an unloving way you can turn the table on them to help them realize they are love too.

What we mean by this is to love yourself first.  Give yourself the benefit of the doubt.  Build yourself up to being, having and wanting the absolute best care you can afford for yourself.

The more you do this, the more you place yourself first, the more your other relationships will fall into place.

As a matter of fact those relationships which were dysfunctional will begin to turn around until the magnificence of both parties to the relationship will begin to shine.

So when you place yourself first, the object of your affection shifts from someone else to you and in so doing that someone else realizes you and your magnificence too.

They then seek love from you, becoming more lovable in the process.  Those that meet others who have good self esteem learn how to have it more for themselves in the end.  They become more loving towards themselves, towards you and the circle is completed.

All parties feel love, feel loving and finally fall into love.

Love is not something you must get.  It is something you already have.  The secret to being in love and having love is to know you have it now.

Once you have this shift starting with yourself, others will flock to you.  They will shift their vibration to feel what you feel and therefore become more loving too.

Never underestimate the power of love, especially if you start with yourself first.

Namaste,

The Ones through Spirit Medium Laura”

Namaste,

Spirit Medium Laura

To book a private session with Spirit Medium Laura go to http://BookLaura.com

References.

Video How to Get Your Ex Back.  Go HERE.

Video How to Get Your Ex Back.  Go HERE.