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TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS: Recognizing and Rectifying
At times I get to work with clients in toxic relationships. One of the most interesting aspects of a toxic relationship is that you do not know you are in one!
I know this may sound very strange indeed, but when you are in one, you feel you did something wrong to create the toxicity and if you could just figure out what that is, and fix it, well, then the relationship would be love and kisses once again.
Usually however the dysfunctional toxicity is not all your creation. Usually the cause is two people coming together to learn how to love themselves, to activate their personal power and to remember who they are on a soul level.
Toxic relationships are soul contracts for growth. One might also call them karmic soul mate relationships.
They are emotionally charged in ways you have never experienced before to get your attention for growth, shift, awakening and empowerment. You did not come to earth to suffer. You came to earth to remember you are magnificent.
Toxic, abusive relationships are extremely effective tools to do this.
Here are some of the characteristics toxic entanglements followed with ideas to break free and find peace, including a channeled message at the end.
Abusive Toxic Relationship Characteristics
1. You don’t know what to do anymore. You are confused, in pain and frantic.
2. There is a triangulation (another lover, person, entanglement, addiction or activity) further confusing your thinking and self esteem. The entanglement appears to you as unattractive for many reasons, but your love interest is nevertheless involved in it and you at the same time.
3. You are a highly empathic, sensitive person, perhaps been told you are psychic.
4. You feel like there is no hope of having peace with your lover but you don’t have the money, the courage or the emotional makeup to break free
5. You have helped this person in many ways, including money, emotional support, loyalty or just being there.
6. This partner is emotionally, physically or verbally abusive of you and you seem to take it, perhaps even feeling like you are being “good” so they will love you back.
7. You are accused by your lover of abusing them, when it seems they are the ones abusing you.
8. You and your lover cannot reasonably discuss, compromise or put honest effort into resolving relationship conflicts. Perhaps there is lying, stretching the truth, competition as to who is right each time you attempt an honest resolution of issues. Anger replaces reason.
9. You or your partner claim to be the supportive one in the relationship having been faithful, loyal, taking care of the household, bills and/or dependents while the other is triangulating their loyalty by being involved with another romantically or in some other way.
10. You pray, ask friends, family, therapists, psychics for emotional support and help to get your lover back so you can work things out.
11. You are giving up hope, considering a complete cut off of contact, but the idea of losing this person, or their being with someone else stops you from setting this boundary.
12. You have never hurt or cried like this over anyone or anything before.
Here is my response to this type of dysfunctional toxic relationship.
I feel situations like this are about self love. All addictive dysfunctional relationships are. So if you find yourself in a similar situation I suggest you do some soul searching about why this person has tapped into a deep seated issue you have about your own self worth.
Then you need to get your self worth back using Soul Abundance concepts outlined in my book called “Soul Abundance,” referenced in 3rd article below. As well there are techniques to improve self esteem in the other articles suggested below.
Below you will find an article on setting boundaries, for example, which goes into self love at the end of it. As well, you might want to do some reading on codependence, perhaps joining a Codependents Anonymous Support Group and check out anything you can find on “Psychopath Free,” a book and support network of some value.
ARTICLES
1. Boundaries Article, especially Self Love channeling portion at end of it. https://www.spiritmediumlaura.com/setting-boundaries-these-things-are-miracles/
2. Psychopath Free Article including additional references for you. Please keep in mind if you are in a toxic relationship it is not only about what is wrong with the other person, it is also about you. http://www.spiritmediumlaura.
3. Addicted to my Ex article including reference to Soul Abundance concepts. https://www.spiritmediumlaura.com/addicted-to-my-ex-soul-abundance-for-addictive-relationships/
You are not alone. Others have suffered this way and come free. So can you.
CHANNELING on TOXIC RELATIONSHIPS
Dear Spirit Guides what can you advise a person caught in an addictive, abusive, toxic relationship cycle?
Yes, it is all about self esteem and self worth. The only way you can truly have self esteem is to love yourself through your purpose or Dharma.
When you know what your gifts are, what your spiritual service is on earth, your self esteem becomes developed. It is all about purpose, being all you can be by understanding and having satisfaction from your service.
If you do not feel you are unique with a purpose you will have no success in growing from this type of toxic relationship.
We ask you to take inventory of yourself. What do you feel you are good at doing? What have others complimented you for? What is it you have come to earth to do? What do you like or love doing?
These are all keys to your soul’s unique purpose on earth. When you tap into this you will meet and make functional healthy relationships.
As we have said before the first relationship you have with yourself. If it is toxic, in not knowing who you are and what is your service, you will dysfunctional relationships with others.
When you create the functional relationship with self, the relationships with others will follow suit and reflect the relationship you have with yourself.
Namaste,
Spirit Guides The Ones through Spirit Medium Laura”
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